I have always been raised to believe that it is the little things in our lives, all coming together that matters most. Through almost all my memories I can stop and single out one particular item, flash imagery or sound that makes that moment stick with me through the years.
Odd to admit but I really don’t remember my first labor and delivery.
Yup, that’s right. I don’t recall holding my my first born right after birth, hearing her cry, what my pain level was or too much of anything other than the overall shock of the moment between the chaos and realness of it all.
One thing I do remember vividly about that late night in early March is how bright the room was. I remember think, “Man, I wish we could dim these lights a little more! I don’t want my baby blinded right out the womb by the glare of florescent lights bouncing off these floors!” -Que dramatic hair flip.
Now how silly is that?! I laugh a little at myself just writing it.
The truth of the matter is that if it had not been for how bright those lights are, I don’t know if I would have even remembered what the room looked like at all.
In retrospect I am grateful the lights were too bright, my baby’s eyes were not blinded (of course we all know that wouldn’t have happened anyway) and its a small bit of the moment that helps me recall so much more.
I can close my eyes, focusing on those bright lights, felling the cold and sensing that smell of the air in that hospital room. I see my husband standing off to my right, even see the look on his face as our daughter was born. Wow, now that is something I cherish.
Thankfully little things like this flood my memories, from childhood on up. I continue to pray it never ends.